confections of perfection

Tuesday, sep. 30, 2003   |   0 comments

You know what is intrinsically hilarious? Always, always funny? When a cat falls into a bathtub. Oh shit. No fair scaring them or setting them up, it has to happen naturally. Planets have to align and angels must flap their wings for you to be lucky enough to look up from your steam-rippled magazine at the exact moment the cat over rotates. Because it’s over in a heartbeat, the cat’s body retreating even as it’s falling. Blink and the cat is already way in the corner, ears flat, eyes glowering, shaking first one leg, then the other. Haha! No harm done, though, right kitty! All good fun?

Or when small children tell you, with the earnestness of a book report written for credit, that the dump they just took looks exactly like an arm.

And, in its own small way, the word “monotonous” is a perfect package … all those ohs and ohs? The word itself is monotonous! Reading the word produces the sensation it describes! Home run, man, royal flush.

Also, and I know I make fun of it but, the clothing store “Cut Loose.” Either way you look at that pun, as an adjective or imperative, it works. Nothing fancy, but it delivers. It’s solid. As opposed to a bedding store by the name of “Downs Syndrome”, that’s a little rocky.