princess and the peeping watch

Tuesday, jan. 7, 2003   |   0 comments

I got this watch for Christmas and it beeps every hour and I can’t figure out how to turn it off. I’ve tried all the buttons, and every combination of button, and then I tried them all again while thinking good thoughts (“pfeffernusse, pfeffernusse, pfeffernusse”), but nothing works. And I left the operating instructions in my mom’s car, I think? So I just stuffed the watch under my mattress, which muffles the high-pitched tooting enough to let me fall sleep. But I just realized that ever since I tucked the watch away, I’ve been having all these hot, sweaty dreams (not in a sexy way), and I’ve been waking up super tired. I also have a mystery bruise on my thigh. So I’m thinking that maybe I have like a modern-day, princess-and-the-pea thing going on, that I’m too tender for this world.