trash talk

Thursday, dec. 20, 2007   |   0 comments

I’ve been feeling mildly out of sorts these days, surely just a case of end-of-year, countdown-to-forty internal grumbling — not blue, really, more a low-grade “what’s going to happen?” crossed with a pinch of “sigh.” One of the ways you can tell the spring in my step is a little sprung is that I start fantacizing about cutting all my hair off, even though I’ve been struggling to grow it out for so very long. Even though I’m headed to Utah in January (Sundance!) and my cold, pale neck will almost surely regret the loss of warmth all that hair and hair and hair provides. Even though I’ve been scouring the archives of The Sartorialist and can’t help but note that the street’s cutest fashionists all have long, long hair. Even though short hair is way more expensive than long hair because you need more product to keep it flat and you need to get it trimmed way more regularly than the every-six-months schedule I’m currently on. And even though I know from sad experience that cutting off all my hair in a pique always leaves me looking and feeling worse — some of you may recall the jellyfish I wound up with in my last post-lay-off slump (not the first one, the second one): giant puffy mushroom top with greasy tendrils along the back and sides.

But still! That great sound and feel of scissors hank-hank-hanking through a wrist-thick tail of hair calls out to me.

The only thing holding me back right now is the fact that I just ordered myself multiple sets of trash ties, the new genius hair-harnessing product from one of my regular Inter-reads, Heather Bailey:

I love that Heather just up and created a product like that, with professional packaging and models and photoshoots and everything. Real, actual people can make their own real, actual products? That’s so inspiring! And how awesome that Trash Ties not only hold back thick, thick hair like mine, but they also have the power to hold me back from an-almost-surely-disastrous hair accident. Thanks, Trash Ties!